We’ve all had moments where we temporarily forget all logic and say or do something stupid. It happens to the best of us. But kids are on another level.
Sometimes they do things that are so unbelievably dumb, that you have to wonder about your own parenting skills. But they’re precious and we love them anyway. If nothing else, they’re a never ending source of entertainment!
1) The ol’ Switcheroo
Fool proof! I can’t believe this didn’ work.
I honestly admire this kid’s ambition though. His parents will have to keep an eye on him as his art skills improve!
My sister take her kid’s Nintendo Switch away at night, so the kids made a fake Switch and tried to swipe the real one and put the fake in its place. pic.twitter.com/2v1yUJ3UHP
— kevinbiegel (@kbiegel) April 16, 2020
2) Teenagers think they’re so cool
At 14, the dog has to go hang out with teenagers. At 21, he goes to university. By 10 years old, he’s retired and collecting pension. That’s just how things work, I don’t make the rules.
I just remembered that when i got my first dog i was 7 and he was 1 (7 in dog years) and i cried when he turned 2 because i didnt think a 14 year old dog would wanna hangout with me.
— Fey (@Trev97) April 10, 2019
3) Creative Halloween costume ideas
Well, it’s certainly unique! Unlike most other kids, who seem to always want to be naked, the little guy must just really loves pants.
Maybe I’ll steal this idea for next year because honestly, he looks pretty cute.
I just want everyone to know that my two-year old insisted on being “pants” for Halloween… pic.twitter.com/ONR7K4AxnY
— Jeffrey Bien (@jungleland) October 31, 2019
4) What does he think a letter is?
I cackled at this one. Spelling can be hard, but… this hard? What are they teaching this little guy in school?
me: It has to be a letter
son: Oh. 9!
me *looks at wife* Are we cousins?
— Josh (@iwearaonesie) May 2, 2018
5) Keep ’em guessing
I actually did grow up with a witch for a mother (a Pagan) and I have bad news for this mom. It did not instil the necessary fear to encourage me to keep my room clean. But I did think the crow she regularly fed in our backyard would tell on me if I did something bad. So there’s that.
my son accidentally colored something blue instead of green, so i told him to just color over it with yellow & when it turned green he asked if i’m a witch and i didn’t say no…so now i bet he’ll clean his fucking room.
— my name is no. (@om_eye_goodness) May 1, 2020
6) Two left feet
I love that he hard a long, hard think about it before responding. Do I have other feet? Are these not my right feet? Are my hands technically my other feet?
The struggle is real. Hopefully he’ll remember this a little easier next time so he knows what to do!
Told my 6yo his shoes were on the wrong feet. After a very long pause he said, "I don't have any other feet."
— Gina Denny (@ginad129) March 30, 2016
7) Protection from UV rays is not a joke
Here’s an easy way to get your kid to do something you don’t want to do! It’s genius! Hopefully she’ll want to wear her “sunscream” from now on, without fearing the sun itself.
Daughter didn’t want “sunscream” so I put her outside and yelled “SUN…. GET HER” and now she’s flipping out.
— Housefly Handrubs (@jacaristar) August 25, 2018
8) The pillowcase swing
I just want to know how the two boys came up with this game in the first place! It’s an amazing idea, assuming it was a sturdy pillowcase. But since she said they are grown up, I think we can safely assume it never went terribly wrong.
When my son Seth was little, he would beg his brother to put him in this particular pillow case and swing him around.
I know it’s insane and the only reason I’m telling you now is because they are grown up and I can’t lose custody of them pic.twitter.com/OCTe1vyjkY
— Omnintensivist (@GoodishIntent) October 27, 2019
9) All tattoos are temporary, right?
This might be the cutest thing I’ve ever read. A child’s innocence is just too much sometimes, I’m not sure I would have it in me to explain that they’re permanent. Little gal, always get your mom’s help when putting on your tattoos!
10) This problem solver
This is just layers of hilarious mistakes. But I like his enthusiasm and quick problem-solving solutions. Or at least… attempted problem-solving. Not effective… but very creative!
Today my son drew in red marker all over his face then got scared that we’d be mad so he tried to hide it by wrapping toilet paper around his head like a mummy. Then he promptly ran into a wall and nearly knocked himself unconscious. A comedy of errors every day with this kid.
— Matt Walsh (@MattWalshBlog) November 26, 2019
It only gets harder from here, so I like that this dad is really leaning into working with his toddler’s mind-set. But I have a more pressing question. Very important. What kinda kid doesn’t like butter on their toast?!
Toddler: Daddy I want toast.
Me: ok, buddy. Here’s some toast.
Toddler: I don’t like butter on my toast
Me: (flips toast over to the dry side and hands it back) There ya go.
Toddler: Thanks Daddy!
Toddlers are dumb. Take advantage of it while you can.#Dadlife
— TwinzerDad (@TwinzerDad) January 23, 2019
12) You are here
This is so pure… but… yes, a little absent minded. Maybe he’d fallen down too many times snowboarding that day. Or maybe he just doesn’t know how maps work.
one time when i was snowboarding with my dad one of the big trail map signs had a “you are here” sticker so i asked how they knew where we were and i think thats when he knew i was gonna be a fucken idiot
— randy (@randypaint) January 2, 2020
13) An artist in the making
Why is this so alarming to look at? I’m crying. This kid must have just learned how to draw legs and wanted to show off his skills. But he’s created a monster.
So my 4 year old nephew asked me to draw him Harry Potter, he then excitedly shouted “I’LL DO THE LEGS!!!!” pic.twitter.com/efHATwwfwZ
— s (@sphiaalln) November 21, 2019
14) Expecting a fur baby
This would be terrifying! I can’t believe this poor girl carried that dark haunting secret to herself for an entire month. This is why it’s so important to teach your kids about sex. Or they’ll be afraid to pet dogs.
I thought women had their periods forever. When my first period stopped I assumed the neighbours’ dog impregnated me when I pet him. For a month I believed myself to be carrying a half human half dog baby. This story is brought to you by Ontario Catholic School Sex Ed in the 90s.
— Julie Mannell (@JulieMannell) July 13, 2018
15) “nose medicine”
Oh lord and this is one of those situations where if you try to over-explain it, it looks even worse. And on top of that, you can’t explain to the kid why they have to re-word it!
My 3 year old calls Flonase "mommy's special nose medicine" and now my neighbor thinks I do cocaine.
— Some Boys' Mother (@someboysmother) February 6, 2020
16) Naked time, all the time
What is it with kids and always wanting to get naked? I mean, no one likes to wear pants. But if you leave a toddler alone for a minute – boom! at least one piece of clothing has been removed.
You spend hundreds, thousands of dollars on clothes, and they get poop on them and get tossed on the ground at their earliest convenience. But they look cute for the 10 minutes they’re on, right?
People coming over.
Me: *tidies up*
Husband: *fires up the bbq*
Toddler: *removes all clothing*
— Manic Mama (@JannaKillHimNik) June 7, 2019
17) He must not have liked his jersey color
He’s too focused on the game to pay any attention to the faces of the other kids. But there’s also that part at the end where you all high five each other. So it’s pretty funny that he went to game after game, high fiving people every time, and was never surprised that they were always new faces.
yesterday morning after his soccer game, my 6 year old asked me how come the other team gets to change the color of their jerseys every week, while we always had to wear purple. when i explained that, in fact, we were playing against different teams each week, his mind was blown.
— Daniel Alarcón (@DanielGAlarcon) May 5, 2019
18) Big oof
This one hurts! Glasses are already painfully expensive, they’re so easily lost. But to be thrown away for something as easily fixed as dirty lenses? My heart breaks for these parents.
We cant find my 6 year olds glasses. Today we asked him where they are. He said and I quote “I threw them in the garbage yesterday, the lenses were dirty”.
$400 – see yeah! pic.twitter.com/TBsP3laC3p
— Jesse Modz (@jessemodz) January 2, 2020
19) No hablan Español?
Hot tip! This is the best parenting idea I’ve seen in a long time. This woman deserves an award. Who knows, they may pick up a few words one day.
And imagine the look on these kids faces when they hear their sleepy pre-nap language spoken in public!
20) Tomato warning
I don’t know what kind of tomato this kid was picturing, but honestly if she thought it was worth hiding from, I’d be terrified too. I’m picturing something like the Kool-Aid man, and it’s not cute.
We went into the basement for a tornado.
My 3-year-old thought we were hiding from a tomato.
Honestly, that scared her even more.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) May 2, 2016
21) Kids will trade anything
I made some bad Pokémon card trades in my day, but never ever did I trade my imagination for some fruit snacks. A Game Boy? I would have. But never just some measly fruit snacks.
My toddler just spent five minutes explaining that he can't use his imagination because he traded it to a kid at daycare for some fruit snacks. Ok, bro.
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) November 11, 2019
22) The power of branding
It’s not even tacos and this still worked. This parent is on some next level brilliance here. Their kid? Not so much.
Alfie has been very very picky lately…but LOVES Taco Bell. So I made a home made meal and put it in an old Taco Bell bag. And IT ACTUALLY WORKED. pic.twitter.com/HgfmBVMwoA
— Disney Hipsters (@DisneyHipsters) March 18, 2019
23) This girl who is not excited to be a big sister
It’s impossible to know how kids are going to react when you tell them they have a sibling on the way. Some are stoked, and others, well not so much. This little girl is the perfect example of the latter response. I’m sure she’ll warm up to the idea!
24) The old “it wasn’t me!”
What pray tell is this? A child… drawing on a wall? Surely not. They would never!
Why all the coloring books, paper, chalk boards and hundreds of other artistic tools we give them are not enough… I’ll never understand.
25) Important Aarons
This is cute and I love that it’s stuck with her all these years later. My errands would be called Naomis, what about you?
My dad’s name is Aaron so when I was little and he said he was going to run errands, I heard “Aarons” and figured that adults just called the chores they had to do by their own name, and to this day I still secretly think of my chores as Ellies :)
— tremulous_poodlet (@EllieReedHayden) August 5, 2018
26) “Yes hi, I need to return the farts”
Out of all the things a kid could buy behind your back this has to be the funniest! It would be hard to hold back laughter when scolding them for this one. And while explaining to the customer service team that your kid desperately wanted a pack of farts.
27) This kid who’s missing the big picture
Most kids scream and shout when they find out their parents are taking them to Disney World. But this hilarious old soul was more concerned about his cat. And a four hour wrong turn is one heck of a mistake to make. I would have been thrilled if my parents “made a wrong turn” and we ended up at Disney World. I hope he enjoyed his time there eventually!
28) These kids who have their teacher’s back no matter what
The fact that they didn’t tell any of their parents kills me! I would probably want to have a little chat with my kid after this one and say ummm please tell me if you think your teacher is getting her drink on while in class!
29) At least he wore the goggles
Kids will come up with just about anything to pass the time. And it’s amazing what they’ll do when they don’t have a tablet to keep them busy. This may not be the best use of their time, but it’s nothing if not creative.
Would you not notice if you left it on the bus? Could you even leave it in your locker if you tried? I am beside myself and it’s not even my kid.
This mother is about to resort to violins. https://t.co/Q4vVdoBxBR
— Lester Kiewit (@lesterkk) August 2, 2019
31) She tried
I love the gumption behind this effort. But in order to really make a change you have to like, actually stop eating meat. But look, I feel the struggle. Bacon is so delicious it’s a hard one to go cold-turkey on.
32) Just like Spider-man
This was wild from start to finish. It’s a good thing his dad was home! You’d think you wouldn’t have to warn your children not to hang themselves with the window blinds string… but this kid is proof that you’d be wrong.
33) The opposite of “got your nose”
The fact that this worked is amazing. This is your hair now little guy, like it or not. Sorry, I don’t make the rules.
Why didn’t he just try to take it off?! The expression is priceless.
34) Where did the kid learn this though?
Most kids just leave the tooth neatly under the pillow and look forward to the money the next day. This kid built an entire shrine, complete with (friendly) security guards and a sacrificial goat.
Where did he learn to sacrifice a goat to the gods and/or tooth fairy? Unknown.
35) A one-time use dog?
Maybe the kid thought she was taking a different dog somewhere every day? Or that the neighbor is a professional dog walker and takes a different pet every day. Imagine how mind blown she must have been to find out the same dog lived with the neighbor!
4yo neighbor is thrilled to learn i walk the same dog every day
“this looks like this same dog from last time!”
“DAD ITS THE SAME DOG AS LAST TIME”
— Molly Priddy (@mollypriddy) May 14, 2019
36) The pawfect alibi
“I was vandalized.” As a parent, it’s inevitable that you will have marker drawn on your face at least once, but blaming it on the dog is too good. Of course the creature with no opposable thumbs was the one with the marker! Duh, Dad.
37) This was almost a good idea
“My son’s latest attempt at ‘hide and seek.'”
Don’t ever ever let him stop believing this is effective. You can relax in another room for a bit while he thinks you’re looking for him. He’ll think it’s the best hiding spot of all time!
38) Swallowing a SIM key and a penny
“This was few years ago… He was fidgeting with the SIM Key while playing video games and he got a little too excited and ended up inhaling the key. The next day he was showing his brother what happened with a penny and bam… he swallow the penny too.”
We all have to learn from our own mistakes. But sometimes it takes a few gos before the lesson sticks. This is the perfect case and point.
39) She almost tore this family apart
Imagine the pure panic on this man’s face when this question was asked. You can be totally faithful and innocent, and this will still make your heart race.
Once thing I will say, is that I’ll never look at a face mask the same way again.
40) It all makes sense now
I love that this somehow seemed like the best way to avoid getting in trouble. Instead of just putting the shoe back on, hide all the evidence and just toss it. Kid logic is somethin’ else, man.
41) Oh, the injustice
Kids just do not like being told no! But how long would they last if we weren’t around to stop them from literally drinking poison. This will be hilarious to share with her when she grows up and can understand a warning label though! The temper-tantrum will not have been for nothing.
42) They’re not like Care Bears honey
I mean… most people don’t want bears hanging around their homes. It’s a good thing he didn’t live in an area of the country with bears or his parents may have had bigger problems! And the poor guy was missing out on all that lid-yoghurt for nothing.
43) Well… does it?
Why would a child put a screw driver in the sink? I’m not sure the culprit himself could answer that question. But the bigger question is… does drain-o work on screw drivers? We need an update.
My university roommate used to put all kinds of things down the sink in our dorm room because she didn’t understand that it wasn’t a garburator. We had to call maintenance on so many occasions and thought it was the sink’s fault. Nope! Turns out she was putting noodles, mashed potatoes, and cereal down the sink. You live and learn.
44) A new meaning to the song “Bad”
I have questions. Who took the picture and why didn’t they set this kid straight? Could it possibly be a bad Michael Jackson impersonator? Is the jacket a coincidence? I need answers!
I hope this kid (or I assume, adult by now) frames this. I would.
45) I need a hippopotamus for Christmas
Kids have the funniest priorities and this is an epic example. Who needs air when you can have your very own hippo? Not even candy made the needs list!
46) Mashed potatoes
Ah, adventures in cooking. I need to know if the kid even bothered to peel them, or if he just thought a little masher would magically turn a whole potato into warm mushy fluffy goodness. At least he tried!
47) Hot tip for every parent:
Say it again, louder for those in the back! This is a hot tip for parents everywhere. Also prepare for the day that they figure it all out… but it’ll work like a charm for a little while at least. For me, it was a black dot on the tip of my nose that apparently outed my lies, but the ears one is way better.
48) Bath time
I love that he made it all the way to adulthood before learning this truth. But hey, we really can’t blame him for making that connection. This water is warm enough for Luke. Must be Luke warm!
49) Is this even possible?
First of all, farting because you’re being tickled is undeniably hilarious. But saving a fart? I didn’t know it was possible. I didn’t know it was something to be considered. What is “later”? What occasion?
50) This is wholesome
It’s easy to forget how silly some of our phrases can be. And especially difficult for kids to understand. But how cute is it when they try to make sense of it for the first time? Watching kids learn is one of the best parts of seeing them grow up.
51) Why didn’t anyone tell them?
So many people probably walked away confused by this. But how is it possible that no one thought to explain that a cold does actually constitute being sick? I love it… but why?
52) A valid point
This is something I would 100% say to my boyfriend if he were allergic to cats. This kid is going places. This is problem solving at it’s finest right here. Go get out your tent, I’ll get the litter box.
4-year-old: Can we get a kitten?
Me: I'm allergic. We can't be in the same house.
4: You could sleep outside.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) August 25, 2016
53) It’s never their fault
One day they’ll learn that the yelling can be entirely avoided if they get ready on their own. But it will probably take approximately 625 more times before this lesson is learned. All you can do is start yelling earlier, until that day.
dad: "come on, you guys are LATE!!!!"
11yo: "you should have started YELLING at us earlier!"
— dadmissions (@Dadmissions) June 30, 2016
54) The quiz is too hard
Maybe consider reading it again little buddy. And potentially even taking some notes. I would like to know what information he did retain, if not the Dog’s name.
Bea: Can you quiz me on my book "A Dog Tail"
Me: How long's the tail?
Bea: No idea.
Me: Dog's name?
Bea: I ONLY READ THE BOOK ONCE, GOD!
— kelly oxford (@kellyoxford) May 22, 2016
55) You know, blueberries? Blue is just like that.
To be fair, I think this little gal was set up for failure. Your average adult would struggle to describe a color to a blind person. But it’s adorable that she tried! Such innocence.
You what blue raspberry kool-aid tastes like? Blue looks like that.
56) Was the pool too big?
This parent dropped some serious money on a pool, obviously expecting their child to be stoked. And yet, who knew they could have used an old bucket instead?
Is this child a cat? If it fits, I sits.
57) Trader Joe
Kids can be so crazy! Their concept of personal possession and value aren’t quite developed yet.
In the first grade a boy in my class brought me one of his mom’s diamond rings as a gift. Being 6 I didn’t think much of it and thought it was a cool present – obviously my parents lost their minds and made me give it back.
I hope this kid got his tablet back too!
I just asked my 8yo to quit yelling and he said, "I'm NOT yelling. This is my voice and all my life I've been whispering. Now I'm free!"
— JennyPentland (@JennyPentland) December 21, 2013
59) This is why it’s important to talk to your kids about sex!
I’m surprised this poor mother didn’t have a heart attack! But once she figured it out it must have been quite the laugh. And probably lead to an overdue chat about the birds and the bees.
60) Is that what grown ups do?
I had never considered this to be the benchmark for adulthood, but you know what? She’s not wrong. Maybe get her a little practice knife that she can use for the next like…. 15 years.
My 2yo said she is a grown up. I told her she isn't, that she is a toddler. She replied, "No, I'm a grown up. I'm going to touch knives."
— jess a brambles company ⚪️ (@jessokfine) June 29, 2015
Is she insinuating that her mom is evil and looking for her backstory? Or is she working on concocting her own? This is very suspicious and I love it.
7yr old daughter walked in the room, casually confirmed, "You have to have a backstory to why you're evil, right?" And walked out.
— kelly oxford (@kellyoxford) January 24, 2016
62) Oh, I will mind
Get the bowl of rice ready, I’m certain this is not an innocent question.
4yo: What happens if your phone goes in the potty?
4yo: Never mind.
— Stephanie Jankowski (@CrazyExhaustion) September 2, 2015
63) True dat
Yes and mommy’s job is to try and keep you little monsters in line!
My 9 y/o, after I said he and his bro were being annoying: "But we're kids. It's our job to be annoying." True dat. #shitmykidsaid
— cheryl (@cheryl629) September 21, 2014
This has not aged well. But on March 12, we hadn’t yet descended totally into the madness we are living in now. I mean, the kids were still at school!
I really hope all of them are okay and no one passed anything on to their friends while playing this silly game!
65) This is heart-attack material
I honestly don’t know what I would DO if I walked into this situation. My heart stopped and it’s not even my kid! Who knew Kool-Aid could be used to look exactly like blood? I’ll keep this in my back pocket for a prank one day.
This is funny on so many levels, and I love that this person shared this with the world. Why did she think Nick Jonas was some kind of night kidnapper? Those sunglasses are so fly, she really could have been in Priyanka’s place right now. If only he’d seen (and stole?) her sooner.
67) Incest isn’t cool
This is a lot of information for the kid to take in at once but, it must be done. It’s common for kids to go through a phase where they want to marry their mommies, daddies, or siblings, but to be prepared for an arranged, incestuous marriage before the second child is even born is just too funny!
68) This hurts
Oh man, is this economy?! Precious precious toilet paper down the drain – literally. That would be such a mess to clean up. The joys of parenting, right?
69) It’s always the dog, isn’t it?
This is derivative of the classic “the dog ate my homework” or “the dog farted” but… a little less believable. Worth a shot though.
70) A very deep journal confession
But if we’re being real… do any of us really know? Wait until this little one hears “Hit me baby”. That’ll definitely stump her.
71) Don’t let the lack of arm holes hold you back
And in that moment, I would wager that “shirt” became their favorite. What? I can’t wear my favorite arm hole-less shirt? *cue the waterworks*.