When it comes to parenting, everyone thinks their way is the right way.
What would you do if you caught your kid bullying another? Would you make them apologize? How would you handle the punishment? One dad knew exactly how to handle it, and he decided to share his method of punishment on social media.
When his 10-year-old son was kicked off the bus after bullying another student, Bryan Thornhill made him run to school.
He followed him in the car to make sure he was safe and to make sure he was really running. He didn’t just refuse to drive his son; he actually made him jog the whole way. He felt like it was a good punishment and let his son know that bullying wasn’t going to be tolerated.
He explained:
“This right here is just old-school, simple parenting. This ain’t killing nobody, this is a healthy way for a child to be punished, because it’s exercise. Teach your child a lesson. You don’t have to kill ’em, you don’t always have to beat ’em. Sometimes it sucks for them, and that’s what teaches them.”
But not everyone felt like the punishment was acceptable.
Some people felt that he was being too harsh on his son and that forcing him to run to school was just cruel. Thornhill never doubted his punishment and said he expected that there would be a few people who had a problem with it. He said:
“If you’ve got your panties in a wad over watching a kid jog, well I feel sorry for you. I’m sure someone will get all bent out of shape, ‘Oh my God, child abuse! A child running’. Don’t be a friend, be a parent. That’s what children need these days.”
He added:
“Just wanted to show everybody, give you a good little laugh.”
Dr. Hannah Thomas, a postdoctoral researcher at The University of Queensland, is one of the people who doesn’t agree with the punishment.
She explained that it could do more harm than good.
“They use shame, humiliation, and guilt to try to motivate change in future behavior. This generally never changes behavior in the long term. It gives the child very limited opportunity to learn and acquire new skills — i.e., ways to interact in more positive and social ways with their peers.
“Children who are humiliated or shamed can internalize negative feelings about themselves that hinder their healthy development. Children misbehave as they learn and develop. They need parents to be supportive when they make mistakes and to take a practical role in teaching their children how to behave more respectfully.”
Thornhill simply doesn’t agree.
He believes that the punishment is very fitting. His son got kicked off the bus, so he needs to find another way to school. If his father drives him, will he really learn a lesson from that? Maybe the next time he thinks of being a bully on the bus, he will remember how badly his legs hurt when he was running to school.
Some people have to learn the hard way, and Thornhill isn’t afraid to let his son be one of those people.
According to the National Bullying Prevention Center:
“Rates of bullying vary across studies (from 9% to 98%). A meta-analysis of 80 studies analyzing bullying involvement rates (for both bullying others and being bullied) for 12-18-year-old students reported a mean prevalence rate of 35% for traditional bullying involvement and 15% for cyberbullying involvement.”
It might be a good thing that Dad is being so stern about the punishment.
Bullying is a big problem in many schools, and some kids are even killing themselves as a result of it. If Thornhill’s punishment can open his son’s eyes, it can’t be all that bad, can it?
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