Being a mom is like juggling flaming swords on a unicycle over a Lego pit – tough but doable. Boost your mom journey with red wine (for antioxidants), spa days with friends, and a dash of mischief.
Hello, boundaries
Life is definitely too short. So why make it even shorter dealing with toxic family members?
Do you want a glass of wine or tequila when you continue to read the examples here? Pour yourself a glass and keep reading!
Cleaning the house
Thanks to this cockroach, the kitchen is clean. If mom sneaks in a cockroach every day, will hubby ever find out it has become a trick?
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Walkie Talkies was the beginning
Are you okay with this list or do you want to change it?
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Ask Yourself
Who are you in this scenario? The architect or raccoon?
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“Good night, me.”
This momma did good. We could all learn from this three-year-old.
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So priceless
These people are just jealous you finally have the time to do it.
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Mind your biz
Don’t mess with their tastebuds! She wants her cake!
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True friends
They’re the type of friends who don’t mind when you show up in a sweatsuit and a bun.
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“I’m aware, okay?”
Do what you do when you’re at the OB and she’ll do her.
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The moment has passed
Just text, people. Stop calling at the same time!
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The real reason
Well, at least divorce is an easier solution.
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You’re fired!
It’s the attitude that got her.
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Ice cream hack
It makes perfect sense, right? Now, what else to learn from her?
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Cat power
Women are queens but cats are royalty.
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Even at midlife
You’ve got no escape until you’ve reached your senior years. And that’s only probably because everyone else doesn’t go out anymore like you.
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Oh, my heart!
You’ve built up in your head how you’re going to enjoy the leftovers and then poof! They’re gone!
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Never say never
Children are always up for a challenge!
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That’s the life!
Ahhhhh, we dream that one day, this dream will come true.
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No returns
There’s no turning back now!
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Can I get a Happy Meal?
They can afford it now!
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Have you?
Too many times!
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No limit
Even grandmas sometimes call out for their own moms.
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FYI world
The cleaning will just have to wait for another day.
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Oh, the joy!
Just give mom a bottle of wine, chips, and Netflix. You can leave her alone, too.
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Yuck!
“This has got to go. This one, too, and this one, this one, and this one. Everything’s gotta go!”
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Bare minimum
I mean, come on, it doesn’t take that much!
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At least a week!
She would be ignored and she can do whatever she wants!
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Girl math
That’s big savings right there!
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A horrifying past life
You don’t want to know what’s behind that door.
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It’s just yogurt
Not everything has to be dreamy. Sometimes, dreams are so practical.
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You’re not alone
Contrary to popular belief, perfect moms only exist in movies.
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Girl gang
Yes, all women need this!
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It’s so late!
Who could be texting at such an ungodly hour?
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Not true
They see you sleeping, too, but they don’t sleep at the same time.
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Grandmas are different
Grandmas were already tough before. Now, they get to be the good cops.
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This is what marriage is about!
Someone has to eat the pickles.
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No choice
She signed up for this and can’t return him to his mother.
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Just in case
That’s why she always needs a phone with big storage.
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Bye!
No questions asked. Just leave.
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Same thing
It’s the same cycle over and over again.
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It is too much to ask for?
It can’t be that hard, right?
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