For one reason or another society has deemed the act of a mother breastfeeding her child as taboo.
Mothers are having to fight for the right to breastfeed their child, battling against those who call it “indecent” and “unnecessary”.
You’d think these uneducated comments were only coming from the dark corners of the country, but regrettably not.
A busy mom
23-year-old Marcella Mares, a student who has been taking an online course at Fresno City College in California, was told that she couldn’t feed her baby during a Zoom seminar.
Marcella had actively decided to take an online course so that she could better care for her baby girl, Olivia.
But one of her professors had a different idea about her right to feed her child, during a Zoom call where students were told they needed to keep their cameras and microphones on throughout.
Four long hours
The call lasted for four consecutive hours, so, naturally, Marcella’s daughter became hungry during this time.
Marcella had already thought ahead and had emailed her professor to let him know that she’d be turning off her camera if and when her daughter needed to breastfeed.
Shock and disappointment
To her disbelief, the professor’s response was to completely shut down Marcella’s suggestion – as if that was what it had been.
Speaking to Today Parents, Marcella recalled:
“He said, ‘You should not be doing that during class. Just do that on your own time or do it after class. “For him to say something like that — it just got me really upset.”
The professor had behaved as if breastfeeding her child was Marcella’s choice, and not a necessity.
To Marcella, it made no sense that she couldn’t quickly switch off her camera – while still being able to hear the seminar – and feed her baby.
A public announcement
But things got worse when the seminar came around and the professor made an announcement.
According to Marcella, the professor said:
“I had a really weird email from a student stating that she needed to do inappropriate things during class time. You need to be creative with your children and accommodate them so you can pay attention to my lectures.”
There are no words for how disgusting this professor’s comments are – and the fact that he thinks it’s okay to publically shame a mom for normal mothering duties in front of an entire class is despicable.
Taking action
Marcella recalled what she did next:
“I emailed him and asked him about the school’s rules and his rules against breastfeeding. He emailed back right away and said that there were no rules, that he’s just following the syllabus guidelines.”
At first, Marcella was doubting herself, wondering if she really had done something wrong. But after speaking with her husband, she decided to contact the school about it.
She got in touch with the school’s Title IX coordinator for support around breastfeeding at school.
She shared the professor’s email, and the Title IX coordinator responded directly to the professor and explained Marcella’s rights to breastfeed.
An apology
The professor ended up apologizing, saying:
“I apologize for my remarks. … You may now breastfeed your baby when you need to and you may turn off your camera and microphone when you need to.”
Marcella was happy with the outcome, but knew she had to raise awareness to prevent other moms in education from going through her experience.
Spreading her message
She shared a photo of her working while breastfeeding on her personal Facebook profile, writing:
“I didn’t want to post this picture because I just wanted it for me but I just wanted to show that I CAN focus in class WHILE breastfeeding my child. My professor changed the requirements for class & said we needed to have our camera & microphone on in order to receive credit for the attendance part of class.”
She then explained the story of her professor’s refusal to let her breastfeed in class, and said:
“I felt so unmotivated during class I was so hurt that an actual human said these things about me & my breastfed baby in public to other students. I was humiliated.
Then I realized, he should be humiliated. He discriminated against me and many others when he said “put those distractions aside or be creative when your child needs you” like what the f*ck?! This is a child we are talking about not our phones or TVs or any other THING. “
Marcella thanked her cousin for helping her take action, and finished by saying that she hopes the professor thinks before he decides to continue with his career. She wrote:
“Breastfeeding mamas & any mama that is trying to juggle school, work, & a child should be praised not put down & humiliated. I love my baby & would choose her health over anything or anyone, any day of any week!”
We are so happy she was able to normalize breastfeeding as a busy student mom to others. Caring for your kids is nothing to feel ashamed about. You can read her full post here.
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