Raising children can be very hard work. When we have kids, its our job to teach them everything they need to know to grow into happy and healthy adults. We have to set a good example for them in our words and our actions and remind them to use what they’ve learned when they’re out in the real world as well. Still, no matter how well-behaved someone’s children can be, they may still face adversity from the outside as well.
Things can be even more difficult when there’s something different about our children as well.
That’s what happened to one family in Washington who argued with the school system over cyberbullying.
The story began when mother Leigh Davey shared a Facebook post about her difficult high school experiences. In it, she detailed what her daughter had been dealing with from other students:
“Our beautiful girl has been subjected to some awful bullying at school. It’s been a very private 7 months for us, dealing with this, immediate family only.
In this age of social media, children (because they are children) think it’s ok to send hateful messages (to me also along with their parents who won’t take responsibility) without consequences. I’ve had calls from these children calling me an old hag because I’ve defended our daughter, approached parents and pleaded with them to talk with their children and ask them to stop. I’ve even approached the children themselves, but been threatened by parents with harassment.
The WA department of education doesn’t expel children from schools for bullying, as they say: ‘Every child is entitled to an education.”
Still, the entire situation soon got more complicated.
As a result of the bullying, Davey’s daughter had begun to develop issues with self-harming behavior as well.
As the post went on, Davey explained just how serious and extreme the bullying had become:
“She’s been sent home numerous times after self harming at school. She’s not allowed a pencil sharpener as she takes the blade out and cuts herself.
The WA department of education also told me: ‘You should teach your child how to be resilient against bullies.’ Yes, they said that.
Our girl has had a video taken of her sitting at her desk at school, legs slightly open, with a lovely caption about the smell. It was posted to snapchat. I spent 90 mins with the police as they tried to determine if it was photographing and distribution of pornographic material. Yes, a 12 year old can be prosecuted if the content breaches certain criteria. Sadly our daughter’s didn’t, but she was subjected to weeks of ridicule. Repercussions? The girl who posted the video lost her playtime. The person who took the video? Nothing, because no one would tell who it was.
It’s ok to verbally attack at school because they can get away with it via a screen; so think the same will happen in the real world.
Last week, we spent over 5 hours in A&E with psychiatrists, doctors and nurses, because our girl ‘had a plan to commit suicide’. On Tuesday, I am in court applying for a VRO against a 12 year old to keep her (the bully) away from our beautiful girl—all because parents don’t accept responsibility for their children and schools can only do so much.”
Above it all, Davey simply wanted the school system to take responsibility and to step up to the negative behavior that was happening.
Finally, she made a call for the internet to spread the word and show their support that way:
“Please, in this awful age of social media (or anti social media as we call it) check your children’s messages. Their devices are a privilege, nothing more, nothing less, so please make sure they are being polite and respectful in their messages. Teach the children to ‘talk’ not use text or social media to air their differences.
Bullying affects the whole family, not just the bullied. It needs to stop and it needs to stop now! Please feel free to share.”
Though the post was originally shared on Facebook, it has since gone viral and reappeared on many different online publishers.
Above all, this story reminds us just how important it is to protect our children and to speak out against bullying behavior. While the attitude towards these negative behaviors has changed in recent years, stories like this one remind us that these bad situations can happen anywhere and that we need to stay engaged. Just as the internet came together to show this family the support they needed in a hard time, we also need to come together to make the world a safe place for children.
We’re sending all our love and support to the Davey family.
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