It’s incredibly hard to lose a spouse. But it’s even harder when you have children and have to explain why their parent is no longer around.
But Kait Brazel of Colorado Springs managed to do it with grace.
Kait lost her 37-year-old husband Staff Sgt. Alfred “Fred” Brazel to stage IV rectal cancer in July. Explaining the loss to her 8 and 5-year-old sons, Mason and Mylan, wasn’t easy but she managed to do it in a way so that they could better understand it.
“I tell them, ‘We are here as tools for God. God knew that Daddy was a really strong person, and there were some people God couldn’t reach unless he used Daddy as a tool,’” the 29-year-old told ABC News. “That’s how we went with it and how we justified it. That’s what we believe.”
Kait says she and her family didn’t view Fred’s death as “a sad thing” and that her boys haven’t cried once over their father’s death.
“That was the attitude and mentality we had throughout the battle. We as a family lived and continue to live life to the fullest in every moment,” she told TODAY. “We don’t shelter them from ‘adult things.’ It was their dad and they were a part of the fight. We have always been very open with them, and because of this I believe they have handled the whole journey amazingly.”
She recently brought her sons to visit their dad’s headstone for the first time at Arlington National Cemetary where the sweetest photos of the children were taken.
“We brought a blanket. Mylan said he felt like he could feel his daddy, and he wanted to take a nap with him,” Kait told ABC News. “He is laying there taking a nap with his dad and Mason is beside him praying. They took time together with each other and I just stood back.”
The boys talked to their dad and shared news about their life with him during their visit. Mylan explained that he earned a uniform and belt in fight class and that he won a cake at a Halloween party.
Mason talked about how he won a trophy for his breaststroke in a swim competition.
When they were done they were about to get into their truck and make the 24-hour drive back home, but there was one more thing than Mylan had to do. He wanted to give his dad a hug so be ran back and hugged his father’s headstone.
“I felt proud while we were there,” Kait told TODAY. “Obviously it was sad because the boys are talking to their dad and he can’t talk back, but really I’m proud because throughout the fight our goal was to be realistic with the boys without the losing their innocence as children.”
Learn more about this touching story in the video below.
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